Well, I Thought He Liked Me....

But maybe he changed his mind. Once again, I haven't heard from Eric in a few days. The last time we spoke was on Sunday morning when he called me for a beer recommendation to take to his friend's house for dinner. I told him I'd call him back (I wasn't really in a place where I could talk) and when I did, he didn't answer. So, I left a message, but he never returned the call. Then on Monday morning I sent him a quick email asking about the beer he chose - very casual....but he never responded. It's Tuesday night and I'm still waiting. I thought "well, maybe I'll just give him a quick call to see if we can catch up." Called. No answer. I didn't leave a message.

I hate dating. This blog was supposed to be fun, but I feel like I'm just whining now. Blah - hopefully tomorrow will be better....

The Sauce

He called about thirty minutes before our date to make sure he had the correct directions, so I told him how to get to Saucer. However, apparently that is not what he was looking for. What he really wanted to know was how to get to my house to pick me up. I can’t even remember the last time that a date picked me up, so that was nice. And he opens the door for me! Holy crap!

We headed over to the bar and decided to sit outside. It wasn’t too hot, nor too cold, so don’t worry, I was ok – no sweat or goose bumps. We ordered beer and food. Duh. And talked. Not about anything very serious, just general chatting and getting to know you better stuff. There is still so much more that I want to know. And sometimes I don’t remember things the first time they are told to me, so I may be redundant with my questions. Lots of hand holding and such.

It was a fairly short date. I need longer to pull out all the deep, dark secrets!! I can’t just jump in to certain topics of conversation….such as past relationships…

We have plans to see each other next week.

He is yummy!

He calls me Wen. I like it.

No, Really, What AM I going to wear??

I did not plan ahead this week. Thursday crept up on me and now the date is upon me. And I have nothing to wear. In fact I even have to wear a pair of pants to the gym that have paint on them because I failed to do the ridiculous amount of laundry one must do when they work out twice a day. All my clean clothes are still in a basket on the floor in my bedroom. Nothing is ironed. It is raining. What on earth am I going to do? Jeans? Might still be too hot. Capris? Need ironing. I wonder if they even still fit. And if they do, my shirts are not ironed either. Well done, Wendy, well done.

So, at this point the plan is to hit the gym right after work. I'm not even going to keep my stuff in a locker - I'll just bring it to class with me. That way I can get out of there asap, drive home, shower....and maybe iron a shirt. Then I have to make myself pretty, but that only takes about sixty seconds.

Ok! There's the plan! Not that you asked.... I have to do some work now.....

Is Eric reading my blog?

So, after I wrote about Eric not calling, he called two days in a row. And we have a date on Thursday. So far, so good. I'm wondering how things are going to go. Do I greet him with a passionate kiss or a nice hello? I'm thinking kiss. What am I going to wear?? Looks like it might rain that day. None of my rain clothes fit me well right now. I'll just find a casual pair of jeans and nice t-shirt or blouse. I mean, really, it is only the Flying Saucer. We all know I love the Saucer, but its not exactly a venue that requires dressing up. Hell - I've been there directly after mountain biking - mud, sweat and all!!

Melodramatic??

Me? Never. I just need attention and when I don't get it, then I figure that person I want/need attention from is no longer interested. And to be honest - this really, truly is normally the case. I think we all know the saying "he's just not that into you."

I wanted to know. That is the kind of person I am. I need to know and have closure from a guy. So after not hearing from Eric all weekend, I decided to write a quick, quirky email to him. If he didn't answer, then I had my answer. He didn't email back. Instead he called. We talked for a while and then made plans to get together later on this week. He asked. Not me. Hopefully this time we will get to really talk again.

More later.

I don't

think I can do this anymore. I'm too jaded.

What makes me think that any man - young or old - will actually want to date me? Really date me? Not just try to get what they can and when they don't, they leave. Am I not good enough to keep around? Am I only good for one thing? When men don't get that, there is nothing else worthwhile.

He did not call. All weekend. I received one text on Sat night (after I had texted him HOURS beforehand) saying he would call when he was "done hanging out with his buddy." Well, it is 8:30 Sunday evening and I haven't heard a peep.

I'm so tired of it all. You always think "oh, this is the time it is going to work out." And then its not. Again.

I just don't know

I'm scared. I don't know that I could survive another heartbreak. How do you let yourself open up to some one, have feelings for some one, when you are afraid that as soon as you do, he will leave or change his mind about you? Then I wonder - how many other women is he dating? Kissing? I don't share. I know, I know, its only been three dates...but these are the things I think about. There is so much to know about him that I don't know. I realize that is why we date, but why does it have to be so hard? And hurt so much?

Is This Wrong??

Is it wrong to write about some one that you like and enjoy being with? I'm arguing with myself trying to figure it out. Thoughts??

Fajitas, A Movie

And Kissing. Great night.

The waiting game is over....

For today! Going out with him tonight.....

The waiting game drives me crazy

The End.

Butterflies

I haven't had butterflies over a guy in years. Litterally years. In fact, I can't even remember them. Well, it's about damn time.........

"Sorry, but I didn't have time to shave."

After emailing with Zach a few times, I asked if he would like to meet after work one day. He agreed and we decided on Tuesday. Several texts were sent back and forth trying to figure out where to meet - we decided on Dilworth/Southend, but not anything specific at that point. I didn't want to go somewhere to eat bar food, but I didn't want to suggest anything expensive either. Finally decided just to meet at Dilworth Neighborhood Grill for a drink and then go from there.

I get there first and order a beer (Dogfishhead India Brown Ale if you were wondering) even though I wasn't supposed to be drinking beer. It just sounded so yummy! He came in and found me. Unshaved. Though it didn't really bother me, I do have to say, for one day of not shaving, there was a lot of hair! Whatev. He was nice enough and we decided to go to Mamma Ricotta for dinner. It was very good - one of the more flavorful dinners I've had there. The conversation flowed well, but there was a deal breaker on this date. He walked me to my car after dinner and we said goodbye. Nice guy, just not the nice guy for me.